All well written plans have wrinkles and ours would prove to be no different. See, when you sit down with the family and decide that this is what best you have to carefully take into consideration all the pro's and cons. Unfortunately, the economic collapse of the nation was not on the con side when we came up with the SVP position. This was supposed to be a 3 to 4 year gig with the option to go back to work after the girls were settled in school.
When we left the Philadelphia area in 2008 things still had the appearance of normal. By normal I mean the country looked nothing like the train wreck that it would 3 months later. We moved to St Louis, settled in their and watched the layoffs happen on a daily basis. Friends, family, and neighbors alike were heavily impacted by the collapse of the major banking and financial institutions. Unemployment rose, and the market became ultra competitive, and unfortunately as a SAHD, I became less and less marketable as the days went by.
Going into the move to St Louis I knew that I was going to be home full time with the girls since wifey was traveling so much. It made no sense for us to add the stress of day care and sick days and all that garbage if we didn't have to. Fortunately for us we were at a place financially where it just made sense. I accepted that the was my deal for the next 2 to 3 years and that was that. For those of you that know me, this was not easy. I was used to hustling and selling and being out and about. It was like going from 5th gear to 1st with no stops between. Little did I know that my daily stresses in this new role would make a job look like nap time. I obtained a personal training certification while home but really did not do much with it, but we will revisit that another time. I volunteered at my daughter's school often and co-chaired a few events at school to stay active and be able to talk to big people on occasion. I was active in the PTA and tried to make as many contacts as I could but unfortunately we were in an area that was heavily impacted by the economic downturn. I even had the best free head hunter that got me an interview with a pharm company. As it turned out they wanted to hire me but cut the sales force in half a week after they interviewed me.
Well, wouldn't you know that almost to the day of wifey's time commitment in her role was up she got promoted. Such an awesome moment for all of us and I could not have been prouder of what she had accomplished. She is an amazing person and has worked extremely hard to get where she is. This was also huge for the family because we were heading back EAST. Both of our families are from the Northeast so not only was it a great promotion, but it was also bringing us closer to home. We packed up the kids and off we went.
So here we are in upstate NY, wifey has settled in and the girls are doing great. One problem, Dad can't seem to find something to get into. I have had numerous responses to the old resume and have had phone interview after phone interview but unfortunately when we get to the question of "What have you been doing since 2008", it all goes south ........in a hurry. See, most recruiters ( except the one's I know and love!) have issue with the fact that I have been a SAHD for the past three years. I confidently explain to the that if you can sell , than you can sell and reiterate the 15 years of experience I have. Sales is not something that leaves you over time. Unfortunately they are not buying. I even used the sales diamond on one of them and left him speechless. For those of you who know what that is stop laughing....I rocked the diamond! I was even told by a recruiter once ( who was awful) while he read off his script, that since I was out of work for over 2 years that he simply could do nothing for me. I told him it was by choice but still no dice.
If I could give a word of advice to those recruiters out there that are trying to fill positions and get paid per hire it would be this: get me the face to face, I will do the rest. The way I look at it is yes, I have been out for 3 years, but that just means I am well rested. I am not one of these folks walking around waiting for the hammer to drop, miserable with being underpaid for taking on more, and always looking for the next opportunity. I have plenty to give and could sell a ketchup popsicle to a guy in a white suit. Don't judge the fact that I have been home with the kids. Do you have any idea what its like trying to sell a 4 yr old on an outfit to wear in the morning? The fact of the matter is while you are on your computer updating your Facebook status and checking your fantasy team ranking I am doing 4 loads of laundry, cleaning the house and making sure that wifey and the kids are going to have a hot meal by 6:45. Oh , and I forgot walking the ten pound dog 4 times as she has the bladder the size of a pea!
I have decided to stop the search for now and be the best SVP I can be. There is no sense stressing myself over positions that I do not want. Hopefully the calls from the script readers will come to an end and I will have the opportunity to work on a life long dream of mine and finish my business plan for my children's fitness center. If the workforce does not have a position for me than I will just have to create one!
Listen, I am a firm believer that everything happens for a reason, so when the little one starts school full time, I know the opportunity of a lifetime will knock on my front door. See, I am a glass half full guy so I know that not only will I be able to look back on this time and thank my lucky stars I had it, I'll be looking back from my corner office window!
Gotta run, I have pulled pork in the crock pot that needs to come out, and the dog is standing at the back door!
SVP-Out!
Tuesday, January 31, 2012
Wednesday, January 25, 2012
"Mommy and Me " classes
So, the topic was going to come up eventually so I had to figure out how to do a piece on these classes without aggravating the majority of those that read......women. So, what I have come up with is a guide to surviving the class, rather than a rant on ripping them to pieces.
If you "Google" Dad and me classes in the Albany area the first response is "Mommy and Me " classes in the Capital District. this should be a clear indication gentlemen that we are way outnumbered and are going to face an uphill battle when it comes to finding classes and groups that will cater to the sweatpants and sneaker wearing Dad's. Oh no fellas, we are going to have to up our game in so many ways just to survive.
My first word of advice is to make sure that your self esteem is HIGH! In order to walk into one of these classes you need to make sure that you act "as if". For those of you that saw Boiler Room you know what I am talking about. For those of you that did not, acting "as if" is acting in a fashion that exudes confidence. Act "as if" you have been to these classes before. Act "as if" you could care a less that there are 30 women in the room compared to the one male( you!) The likelihood of another guy being in the class is low....very low, and if there is another guy in the class already he is furious with the fact that you are impeding on his Mommy and Me class. It becomes territorial real fast in these classes, which leads to my next piece of advice, Try the class first.
Many of the classes that are offered allow you to come in and test the class out to make sure that it is right for you and your child......DO IT! By doing this you allow your child to get a look at the class and you can survey the situation to see exactly what you are getting yourself into. I believe that I can get a quick read on people in a short amount of time so by watching a class I can figure out who the players are. Before I have left the trial class I can tell if this is going to be a class I can deal with. A helpful hint here is to try and pick a class where you already know one person. My second Mom and Me class in St Louis had a good friend in it ( who was also from Jersey ! ) so it made it easier for me knowing that we were going to be able to chat for an hour while the girls were doing their thing.
When it comes to attire be mindful of the fact that you are 1 guy in a class of 20-25 Moms. Showing up in sweatpants and a t-shirt is simply unacceptable! I made this mistake in my very first class. I showed up to a Mommy and Me gym class in sweats and a T-shirt thinking I was going to be helping her through the class. Little did I know I would be interacting with the Mom that wore $200 pair of jeans and looked like she was ready to go to a club. Take some time and be thoughtful of the audience. If you are going to an active class wear jeans and a golf shirt......little to no effort but makes it look like you at least tried. If you are headed to a gymnastics class or something where you will just be spectating raise the game and put on a button down with jeans. It's not a pick up joint but you want to make sure that you look good. Looking good makes the confidence rise and therefore makes you look "as if" you have done this before. On the flip side you will also notice that the ladies have raised their game in response to you. The Mom who showed up for your first class in sweats and a gap T is now putting in some effort. It's human nature, when you hang out with Mom's all day you get comfortable so when a Dad shows up the rules change. Mom's you know what I mean, and you also know I am right!
My next piece of advice is to PAY ATTENTION!. We as a male species do a fantastic job of the initial handshake and when we walk away for some reason all is forgotten. Be a good listener, you are going to hear some of the funniest stuff ever! It is amazing to me that Mom's rip their husbands to shreds and have no qualms about doing it in front of another guy. Listen to what is going on and be able to add to the conversation. If you have nothing constructive to add, SHUT UP, this is not the time to wing it, they will eat you alive. If you have nothing on a topic, research the topic and be ready for the next class. Not only does it show you are smart but that you were actually paying attention! This will go far and might even make the Mom's put their guard down for a minute. They are already thrown off by having a guy in the room, now having a guy that listens might lead to sensory overload.
My last pice of advice on the topic is to make some friends. The reality of the situation is you are a part of a small population. If the Mom's are cool there is a good shot that their husbands are cool too! You have now made a friend, spouses can meet and the kids already know each other therefore increasing your small social circle. It is a win win for all involved. By getting involved at school and going to these classes I have met some fantastic people that we hang out with to this day.
Listen, these classes are not easy. The name simply makes you want to take your manhood off at the door place it in a box and leave it in a locker until its done. The reality is it can be a really cool experience. You learn a lot about yourself and a ton about the other side! Be open, brush up on the hot kid topics and be able to contribute. Don't under any circumstances be the guy pretending to be working on his iPad in the corner at the class. Me and the Mom's will make fun of you behind your back, and you are most likely playing online poker anyway! I hope these tips help, nobody warned me before I went to the "My Gym" in Missouri so I thought I might try and save you from making the same mistakes I made.
SVP- Out !
If you "Google" Dad and me classes in the Albany area the first response is "Mommy and Me " classes in the Capital District. this should be a clear indication gentlemen that we are way outnumbered and are going to face an uphill battle when it comes to finding classes and groups that will cater to the sweatpants and sneaker wearing Dad's. Oh no fellas, we are going to have to up our game in so many ways just to survive.
My first word of advice is to make sure that your self esteem is HIGH! In order to walk into one of these classes you need to make sure that you act "as if". For those of you that saw Boiler Room you know what I am talking about. For those of you that did not, acting "as if" is acting in a fashion that exudes confidence. Act "as if" you have been to these classes before. Act "as if" you could care a less that there are 30 women in the room compared to the one male( you!) The likelihood of another guy being in the class is low....very low, and if there is another guy in the class already he is furious with the fact that you are impeding on his Mommy and Me class. It becomes territorial real fast in these classes, which leads to my next piece of advice, Try the class first.
Many of the classes that are offered allow you to come in and test the class out to make sure that it is right for you and your child......DO IT! By doing this you allow your child to get a look at the class and you can survey the situation to see exactly what you are getting yourself into. I believe that I can get a quick read on people in a short amount of time so by watching a class I can figure out who the players are. Before I have left the trial class I can tell if this is going to be a class I can deal with. A helpful hint here is to try and pick a class where you already know one person. My second Mom and Me class in St Louis had a good friend in it ( who was also from Jersey ! ) so it made it easier for me knowing that we were going to be able to chat for an hour while the girls were doing their thing.
When it comes to attire be mindful of the fact that you are 1 guy in a class of 20-25 Moms. Showing up in sweatpants and a t-shirt is simply unacceptable! I made this mistake in my very first class. I showed up to a Mommy and Me gym class in sweats and a T-shirt thinking I was going to be helping her through the class. Little did I know I would be interacting with the Mom that wore $200 pair of jeans and looked like she was ready to go to a club. Take some time and be thoughtful of the audience. If you are going to an active class wear jeans and a golf shirt......little to no effort but makes it look like you at least tried. If you are headed to a gymnastics class or something where you will just be spectating raise the game and put on a button down with jeans. It's not a pick up joint but you want to make sure that you look good. Looking good makes the confidence rise and therefore makes you look "as if" you have done this before. On the flip side you will also notice that the ladies have raised their game in response to you. The Mom who showed up for your first class in sweats and a gap T is now putting in some effort. It's human nature, when you hang out with Mom's all day you get comfortable so when a Dad shows up the rules change. Mom's you know what I mean, and you also know I am right!
My next piece of advice is to PAY ATTENTION!. We as a male species do a fantastic job of the initial handshake and when we walk away for some reason all is forgotten. Be a good listener, you are going to hear some of the funniest stuff ever! It is amazing to me that Mom's rip their husbands to shreds and have no qualms about doing it in front of another guy. Listen to what is going on and be able to add to the conversation. If you have nothing constructive to add, SHUT UP, this is not the time to wing it, they will eat you alive. If you have nothing on a topic, research the topic and be ready for the next class. Not only does it show you are smart but that you were actually paying attention! This will go far and might even make the Mom's put their guard down for a minute. They are already thrown off by having a guy in the room, now having a guy that listens might lead to sensory overload.
My last pice of advice on the topic is to make some friends. The reality of the situation is you are a part of a small population. If the Mom's are cool there is a good shot that their husbands are cool too! You have now made a friend, spouses can meet and the kids already know each other therefore increasing your small social circle. It is a win win for all involved. By getting involved at school and going to these classes I have met some fantastic people that we hang out with to this day.
Listen, these classes are not easy. The name simply makes you want to take your manhood off at the door place it in a box and leave it in a locker until its done. The reality is it can be a really cool experience. You learn a lot about yourself and a ton about the other side! Be open, brush up on the hot kid topics and be able to contribute. Don't under any circumstances be the guy pretending to be working on his iPad in the corner at the class. Me and the Mom's will make fun of you behind your back, and you are most likely playing online poker anyway! I hope these tips help, nobody warned me before I went to the "My Gym" in Missouri so I thought I might try and save you from making the same mistakes I made.
SVP- Out !
Monday, January 23, 2012
Laundry
Not knowing that eventually I would become the SVP of Household Ops, I never really paid any attention to the laundry. It was one of those things that eventually had to be done and if we went a week without doing it there never seemed to be a problem. I threw my clothes on the floor in the closet and magically a few days later they were folded and on the bed waiting to be put away. This I could handle. I usually folded a load or two here and there and was kept far away from anything of any importance. Moving to Missouri changed that and changed it fast.
I quickly needed to become the master of the two big machines in the room I never went in. I learned quickly. What I do not understand is why with the technology we have today, we have yet to create a machine that washes and then dries the clothes without switching machines. We can video chat on a phone but we still need to move clothing from one machine to another to complete the cycle.
My mastering of the machines has not come without casualties however. In the beginning I was of the mindset that if it was in the hamper, it was meant to go from washer to dryer and then get folded. Apparently that is not the case. Not only do I need to know which sweaters are "good' sweaters, I need to remember to take them out between switching and air dry them. Who would have thought that a cashmere sweater was not to be dried.......not me! Don't worry though it fit our youngest for a few weeks before we had to eventually get rid of it! What 4 year old doesn't love cashmere? I continue to explain to wifey that if you don't want it washed and dried you need to take it out or send it to the dry cleaner. And jeans .....I always dry my jeans ...they come out wrinkle free and require no ironing. Apparently "Lucky" jeans need to separated and air dried so they do shrink. My advice to wifey was to shrink her rear and we would have no problem. That did not go over well, and if you are married less than 10 years do not attempt that line without a helmet! Needless to say those jeans no longer get dried and I am much more careful on my word selection.
The other thing I do not understand is how two kids that are so small can produce so much laundry. I am confident that there is a sweat shop somewhere in my basement where they are producing clothes faster than I can wash them. I had to have a conversation with my youngest the other day because she was not understanding how her clothes went from the laundry, got folded and then magically ended up back in her closet and drawers. She now understands that there is no such thing as the laundry wizard. And it always seems no matter how many times I do the laundry, when I walk back upstairs to their rooms, there is always more. Where does it come from?
The good thing about me taking over this task is that I can fold it the way I want it folded and empty my pockets of change and junk before they get thrown in the machine. You know how many times I had to be told how much money was found in the laundry? " Consider it a tip" I would say....again, not a solid choice on my part. Wifey is also of the mind set that if you put it in the wash inside out than it will be folded that way. Uh, no, that does not even make sense. Finally I can have all my shirts right side out and folded like the shirts are folded at the Gap!
Laundry is a necessary evil that needs to get done. What once was a weekly event is now a daily event. Gents, cover your tracks.....if it looks like a nice sweater, pull it out, and if the jeans cost more than $100 , air dry them!
next topic - " Mommy and Me" classes.
SVP - Out!
I quickly needed to become the master of the two big machines in the room I never went in. I learned quickly. What I do not understand is why with the technology we have today, we have yet to create a machine that washes and then dries the clothes without switching machines. We can video chat on a phone but we still need to move clothing from one machine to another to complete the cycle.
My mastering of the machines has not come without casualties however. In the beginning I was of the mindset that if it was in the hamper, it was meant to go from washer to dryer and then get folded. Apparently that is not the case. Not only do I need to know which sweaters are "good' sweaters, I need to remember to take them out between switching and air dry them. Who would have thought that a cashmere sweater was not to be dried.......not me! Don't worry though it fit our youngest for a few weeks before we had to eventually get rid of it! What 4 year old doesn't love cashmere? I continue to explain to wifey that if you don't want it washed and dried you need to take it out or send it to the dry cleaner. And jeans .....I always dry my jeans ...they come out wrinkle free and require no ironing. Apparently "Lucky" jeans need to separated and air dried so they do shrink. My advice to wifey was to shrink her rear and we would have no problem. That did not go over well, and if you are married less than 10 years do not attempt that line without a helmet! Needless to say those jeans no longer get dried and I am much more careful on my word selection.
The other thing I do not understand is how two kids that are so small can produce so much laundry. I am confident that there is a sweat shop somewhere in my basement where they are producing clothes faster than I can wash them. I had to have a conversation with my youngest the other day because she was not understanding how her clothes went from the laundry, got folded and then magically ended up back in her closet and drawers. She now understands that there is no such thing as the laundry wizard. And it always seems no matter how many times I do the laundry, when I walk back upstairs to their rooms, there is always more. Where does it come from?
The good thing about me taking over this task is that I can fold it the way I want it folded and empty my pockets of change and junk before they get thrown in the machine. You know how many times I had to be told how much money was found in the laundry? " Consider it a tip" I would say....again, not a solid choice on my part. Wifey is also of the mind set that if you put it in the wash inside out than it will be folded that way. Uh, no, that does not even make sense. Finally I can have all my shirts right side out and folded like the shirts are folded at the Gap!
Laundry is a necessary evil that needs to get done. What once was a weekly event is now a daily event. Gents, cover your tracks.....if it looks like a nice sweater, pull it out, and if the jeans cost more than $100 , air dry them!
next topic - " Mommy and Me" classes.
SVP - Out!
Wednesday, January 18, 2012
"Google"
When I first started playing football my coach handed me a playbook on the first day and told me to memorize it. When I started working, they handed me a manual that directed me on what I needed to do and how it needed to be done. When we moved to St Louis, my wife handed me two little girls and told me to have a good day! Point is, there is no handbook on how to be a SAHD and sometimes you need to make the rules up as you go. There is one thing you need to remember Dad's........GOOGLE!
Picture yourself in a new city with no friends and two small children the require you to keep them entertained for a better part of a day. Now throw in the fact that wifey travels every other week for 2 to 3 days at a clip. You need to be on your A game and you have to know where every major attraction is, where the kid friendly establishments are and most importantly, how to find them.
When we first got to Missouri it was 110 degrees, so parks, playgrounds and things of that nature were going to be completely out of the question. We needed alternatives and quick! I Googled like it was my job to find things for us to do....." Where are the best museums in St Louis?' , " What do you do with little girls when its 110 degrees outside?' , Closest ice cream place to my house" I used Google ALL THE TIME.
As we got more comfortable with surroundings, I realized the Google was not only to be see for things to do, but how to do things as well. My oldest came home one day and said, " Tomorrow is low ponytail day" ........ uh , what???? It took me 6 months to figure out how to do a normal ponytail without ripping out any of her hair and getting my fingers stuck. Now she is asking me to do a specific version???? O, lord. So where did I go, Google. I Googled " How to do a low ponytail" And like magic, there was a picture of Gwenyth Paltrow at some awards show with a low ponytail. Wouldn't you know it really is just a ponytail tied lower than the norm.......WOW! But there was my buddy Google to help me out! Crisis averted. I came clean at the bus stop when the Mom's asked me how I did it....they found it quite entertaining.
I have come to realize that Google has value when it comes to my second graders homework. Apparently they have decided to change the wording for math and when she comes home I often find myself visiting my buddy to find out the proper method to solving some of her math problems. Book reports, art projects , you name it, it's like having the public library at your fingertips.
And last but not least, I hit Google to this day for recipes. There are only so many ways you can cook chicken or fish. I hit Google just yesterday on "Easy ways to bake filet mignon", and guess what ?? Jackpot! I seared for 10 minutes and baked for 25 minutes. you would have thought I had been doing this for years.
I even went as far as Googling " Which beer has the highest alcoholic contest and the lowest calories and carbs" Hey, you chase two little girls around for 12 hrs and see what you Google!
Listen, when you take on the challenge of being a SAHD nobody is going to pull you aside and tell you how things need to be done. You are going to need how to cook certain dishes, find an air conditioned museum, and in some cases know how to do a low ponytail. Fear not gents, there is a tool out there designed specifically for us tat allows us to type exactly what we want and get thousands of ways to do it........it's Google. Live it, learn it, and learn to navigate it. Google is your friend.
Picture yourself in a new city with no friends and two small children the require you to keep them entertained for a better part of a day. Now throw in the fact that wifey travels every other week for 2 to 3 days at a clip. You need to be on your A game and you have to know where every major attraction is, where the kid friendly establishments are and most importantly, how to find them.
When we first got to Missouri it was 110 degrees, so parks, playgrounds and things of that nature were going to be completely out of the question. We needed alternatives and quick! I Googled like it was my job to find things for us to do....." Where are the best museums in St Louis?' , " What do you do with little girls when its 110 degrees outside?' , Closest ice cream place to my house" I used Google ALL THE TIME.
As we got more comfortable with surroundings, I realized the Google was not only to be see for things to do, but how to do things as well. My oldest came home one day and said, " Tomorrow is low ponytail day" ........ uh , what???? It took me 6 months to figure out how to do a normal ponytail without ripping out any of her hair and getting my fingers stuck. Now she is asking me to do a specific version???? O, lord. So where did I go, Google. I Googled " How to do a low ponytail" And like magic, there was a picture of Gwenyth Paltrow at some awards show with a low ponytail. Wouldn't you know it really is just a ponytail tied lower than the norm.......WOW! But there was my buddy Google to help me out! Crisis averted. I came clean at the bus stop when the Mom's asked me how I did it....they found it quite entertaining.
I have come to realize that Google has value when it comes to my second graders homework. Apparently they have decided to change the wording for math and when she comes home I often find myself visiting my buddy to find out the proper method to solving some of her math problems. Book reports, art projects , you name it, it's like having the public library at your fingertips.
And last but not least, I hit Google to this day for recipes. There are only so many ways you can cook chicken or fish. I hit Google just yesterday on "Easy ways to bake filet mignon", and guess what ?? Jackpot! I seared for 10 minutes and baked for 25 minutes. you would have thought I had been doing this for years.
I even went as far as Googling " Which beer has the highest alcoholic contest and the lowest calories and carbs" Hey, you chase two little girls around for 12 hrs and see what you Google!
Listen, when you take on the challenge of being a SAHD nobody is going to pull you aside and tell you how things need to be done. You are going to need how to cook certain dishes, find an air conditioned museum, and in some cases know how to do a low ponytail. Fear not gents, there is a tool out there designed specifically for us tat allows us to type exactly what we want and get thousands of ways to do it........it's Google. Live it, learn it, and learn to navigate it. Google is your friend.
Monday, January 16, 2012
The ten pound dog.
So, lets review....I am a stay at home dad with two little girls. My days are filled with fashion shows, Justin Bieber and princesses. I have attended tea parties with some of the coolest imaginary people you will ever meet, and I can do a ponytail better than 99% of the male population.
While living in St. Louis, we decided that we were going to start the search for a dog, yes, a dog! As if nap time, diapers and trips to the park and the mall were not enough, we were going to throw more chaos in the mix with a puppy that would need more attention than most children. The search was under way and I was stoked because here was my opportunity to take a stand and get the manly man dog that I could walk through the neighborhood and hold my head up high. This was my chance to get a Husky, a Retriever of even a German Shepard of some kind, call him Tank and all would be good.
Well, all good plans have wrinkles and this one was no different. We started our search and all was good until my wife( the one who would be doing little to nothing with the dog) found a rescue center that had a ten pound Maltese named Mia. I was cooked! I took my youngest out to see her one day at the rescue center, which was a woman's house in the middle of nowhere. I was confident we were not going to be taking a puppy home that day and even more confident it would not be Mia. We pull up to the house and out comes the owner of the shelter with Mia. She was frail, had a cherry spot on her eye and looked like she had just gone 12 rounds with a pit bull named Tyson. She was not going to be our dog for sure. We sat with her for a few minutes and let her run around the yard while I spoke with the young lady about Mia and her story. Mia was at a puppy mill in Missouri before being shipped off the NYC. The folks in NYC declined to keep her because of the cherry spot on her eye so she got shipped back. So here we have a 6 month old puppy who has already been shipped twice and now at a shelter........still not our dog. The little one and I packed up and left the shelter and called wifey to tell her the story. She was shocked that we left her there. Well, halfway home I could not get the smell of the shelter out of my head and two years later I am happy to let you know Mia is doing GREAT ....cherry spot gone, healthy as an ox( that weighs ten pounds) and sleeping comfortably with her sister every night.
That being said, the ten pound dog adds an interesting element to the already challenging position of SAHD. Our neighborhood is still in construction mode and there are a ton of construction workers all over the place making it that much more fun to walk the ten pound Maltese. As if I don't have self esteem issues walking into a "Mommy and Me" class , now I am walking the ten pound dog past a bunch of guys with power tools. No matter how hard you try, you can't look really manly when you are walking a dog that is basically the size of your boot. To make matters worse, wifey and the girls thought it would be a great idea to get the dog a sweater..........and guess what color that sweater is? You guessed it, PINK! Needless to say, that sweater only gets worn on the 9:30pm walk when its dark and I know there is zero chance anybody will be outside. I actually walked her one day with a jacket on and the next time I saw my neighbor he questioned my sexuality.( not that there is anything wrong with that) That jacket is gone!
Dogs are an awesome addition to the family and when you have little girls, little dogs make sense. So if you see me walking down the street, just know that my girls come first!
We are off to see the new Alvin and the Chipmunks movie.......yes, that's a topic for another day.
While living in St. Louis, we decided that we were going to start the search for a dog, yes, a dog! As if nap time, diapers and trips to the park and the mall were not enough, we were going to throw more chaos in the mix with a puppy that would need more attention than most children. The search was under way and I was stoked because here was my opportunity to take a stand and get the manly man dog that I could walk through the neighborhood and hold my head up high. This was my chance to get a Husky, a Retriever of even a German Shepard of some kind, call him Tank and all would be good.
Well, all good plans have wrinkles and this one was no different. We started our search and all was good until my wife( the one who would be doing little to nothing with the dog) found a rescue center that had a ten pound Maltese named Mia. I was cooked! I took my youngest out to see her one day at the rescue center, which was a woman's house in the middle of nowhere. I was confident we were not going to be taking a puppy home that day and even more confident it would not be Mia. We pull up to the house and out comes the owner of the shelter with Mia. She was frail, had a cherry spot on her eye and looked like she had just gone 12 rounds with a pit bull named Tyson. She was not going to be our dog for sure. We sat with her for a few minutes and let her run around the yard while I spoke with the young lady about Mia and her story. Mia was at a puppy mill in Missouri before being shipped off the NYC. The folks in NYC declined to keep her because of the cherry spot on her eye so she got shipped back. So here we have a 6 month old puppy who has already been shipped twice and now at a shelter........still not our dog. The little one and I packed up and left the shelter and called wifey to tell her the story. She was shocked that we left her there. Well, halfway home I could not get the smell of the shelter out of my head and two years later I am happy to let you know Mia is doing GREAT ....cherry spot gone, healthy as an ox( that weighs ten pounds) and sleeping comfortably with her sister every night.
That being said, the ten pound dog adds an interesting element to the already challenging position of SAHD. Our neighborhood is still in construction mode and there are a ton of construction workers all over the place making it that much more fun to walk the ten pound Maltese. As if I don't have self esteem issues walking into a "Mommy and Me" class , now I am walking the ten pound dog past a bunch of guys with power tools. No matter how hard you try, you can't look really manly when you are walking a dog that is basically the size of your boot. To make matters worse, wifey and the girls thought it would be a great idea to get the dog a sweater..........and guess what color that sweater is? You guessed it, PINK! Needless to say, that sweater only gets worn on the 9:30pm walk when its dark and I know there is zero chance anybody will be outside. I actually walked her one day with a jacket on and the next time I saw my neighbor he questioned my sexuality.( not that there is anything wrong with that) That jacket is gone!
Dogs are an awesome addition to the family and when you have little girls, little dogs make sense. So if you see me walking down the street, just know that my girls come first!
We are off to see the new Alvin and the Chipmunks movie.......yes, that's a topic for another day.
Thursday, January 12, 2012
Job Security
Ok, the reality of today is that when you want a quick fix or the next best thing you go to the internet and someone guarantees you the keys to success for a fee. I am here to tell you that i am about to give away the golden nuggets for exactly $0. Yes, gentleman, zippy, nada, nothing.
Guys, there is one thing that you need to understand. When you get promoted to SVP of Household Ops you need to do WHATEVER it takes to keep your position and aim for future growth in the company. There are several things you need to do to assure that you not only hold your position but make yourself indispensable in the company. See, the average recruiter will tell you that these days you need to separate yourself from the pack and make sure that you stand out. I, on the other hand will tell you that yo need to take yourself to RockStar status in your household and make sure that you are the glue that holds it all together. Listen, the reality is you are 15 pounds and a receding hairline away from being replaced. If you look like a frat boy with 15 extra pounds and are only interested in fantasy football and poker night , your wife is not taking yoga to learn downward dog for nothing.
Listen, I am not saying that these next few tid bits are full proof but I can tell you that they will get you closer to CEO of Household OPS.
Ok, here we go, swipe your credit card and we can continue : kidding, sometimes I can be a bit of an ass.
1. Stay in shape, she deserves it. That quote actually won me a radio contest in St Louis that got me a $100 gift card that I never used. I have the card in my wallet as a keepsake to remind me why I am the best at what I do. the question was " What tips do you have for a stay at home dad". My tip was one of thousands that made the air and won me $100. Trust me I am a lot smarter than I look. : ) Listen I work out seven days a week and if they added an eight day I would do some light cardio just to feel good about myself. I think that if your wife is willing to go out and make the bacon the least we could do is make sure that she comes home to something that looks more like a calendar than a before picture.......know what I mean? There is a sense of responsibility to make sure that you are keeping up to your end of the bargain. Do some push ups, pull ups and cardio and you should be fine. if you are like me, subscribe to the beach body plan and get all the new Tony Horton DVD's. You'll get jacked in 90 days and thank me later.
2. Learn how to cook. I am not asking you to go see Gordon Ramsey and learn how to make some ridiculous meals that require a great deal of attention, but I am asking you to be able to have a hot meal on the table when she walk through the door. More than likely is she ate like junk all day and is looking to you to provide the one meal of the day that will have some nutritional value......don't mess it up! Do not under ANY circumstances mistake nuggets and fries for a meal that will make her happy. Put some effort into it and make sure that when she walks through the door she says" wow, what smells so good" JACKPOT FELLAS ...... you might actually get some tonight, kidding we all know that we are married and that is reserved for weekends, birthdays and the occasional wednesday night rollover. hehe. Seriously, read a cookbook or two and be able to make a solid fish , chicken and lasagna dish. She is the mother of your children and works her as off, the least you could do is make sure she gets a good meal when she gets home.
3. Fire your housekeeper. Listen, if your wife is at work and your kids are at school or napping for 3-4 hours per day there is no reason in the world you can't clean the house. I myself am a neat freak so when the kids make a mess the mess is going before they leave the room. That being said, if you fire the housekeeper, there is a NEED for someone to clean. you as the SVP fill that need for a very nominal fee. Take your time and makes use that your kids could eat their fruit loops off the floor and all of the sudden you have elevated your stock from caretaker/buff nugget to .....caretaker//buff nugget and housekeeper. Holy shit fellas that to me is a trifecta. the likelihood of finding a guy that can cook, clean and is in shape is like the Jets winning the super bowl with Mark Sanchez at the helm.......1 in a million! Stock rising. Do you see what is happening here?
4. Rock Star Status. I am a stay at home dad with two little girls but there is one thing that i am certain of. I am an absolute Rock Star in their eyes. There is nothing in the world i would not do for them to make them smile and they know that come hell or high water Dad's got their back! Listen to your kids and make sure you never dismiss any of their concerns as silly or unimportant. If they are important enough for them to bring them up,they are important enough for you to listen to. Make every day a Friday and no matter what is going on in this crazy world, shield them from it and make sure that the most disastrous thing in their world is the argument they had on the bus about which Barbie was the hottest. Get involved, volunteer at school, download their favorite music and memorize all of the lyrics. you got one shot deal.......make it count!
Its not full proof....and far from a Bible, but those are some pretty solid stepping stones to make sure you get off to a good start. Best of all.........FREE. WHY? Because I am that type of guy. I believe in paying it forward. Nobody sat me down and gave me the rules, I learned them on my own. Had someone told me these tips I'd be two years ahead of where I am now. Enjoy, and remember........Michael Jordan once said " I missed `100 % of the shots I didn't take" Break some eggs, pull a muscle on the treadmill and have some fun in the process. You get one chance to be a parent........SWING FOR THE FENCES.
SVP- OUT
Guys, there is one thing that you need to understand. When you get promoted to SVP of Household Ops you need to do WHATEVER it takes to keep your position and aim for future growth in the company. There are several things you need to do to assure that you not only hold your position but make yourself indispensable in the company. See, the average recruiter will tell you that these days you need to separate yourself from the pack and make sure that you stand out. I, on the other hand will tell you that yo need to take yourself to RockStar status in your household and make sure that you are the glue that holds it all together. Listen, the reality is you are 15 pounds and a receding hairline away from being replaced. If you look like a frat boy with 15 extra pounds and are only interested in fantasy football and poker night , your wife is not taking yoga to learn downward dog for nothing.
Listen, I am not saying that these next few tid bits are full proof but I can tell you that they will get you closer to CEO of Household OPS.
Ok, here we go, swipe your credit card and we can continue : kidding, sometimes I can be a bit of an ass.
1. Stay in shape, she deserves it. That quote actually won me a radio contest in St Louis that got me a $100 gift card that I never used. I have the card in my wallet as a keepsake to remind me why I am the best at what I do. the question was " What tips do you have for a stay at home dad". My tip was one of thousands that made the air and won me $100. Trust me I am a lot smarter than I look. : ) Listen I work out seven days a week and if they added an eight day I would do some light cardio just to feel good about myself. I think that if your wife is willing to go out and make the bacon the least we could do is make sure that she comes home to something that looks more like a calendar than a before picture.......know what I mean? There is a sense of responsibility to make sure that you are keeping up to your end of the bargain. Do some push ups, pull ups and cardio and you should be fine. if you are like me, subscribe to the beach body plan and get all the new Tony Horton DVD's. You'll get jacked in 90 days and thank me later.
2. Learn how to cook. I am not asking you to go see Gordon Ramsey and learn how to make some ridiculous meals that require a great deal of attention, but I am asking you to be able to have a hot meal on the table when she walk through the door. More than likely is she ate like junk all day and is looking to you to provide the one meal of the day that will have some nutritional value......don't mess it up! Do not under ANY circumstances mistake nuggets and fries for a meal that will make her happy. Put some effort into it and make sure that when she walks through the door she says" wow, what smells so good" JACKPOT FELLAS ...... you might actually get some tonight, kidding we all know that we are married and that is reserved for weekends, birthdays and the occasional wednesday night rollover. hehe. Seriously, read a cookbook or two and be able to make a solid fish , chicken and lasagna dish. She is the mother of your children and works her as off, the least you could do is make sure she gets a good meal when she gets home.
3. Fire your housekeeper. Listen, if your wife is at work and your kids are at school or napping for 3-4 hours per day there is no reason in the world you can't clean the house. I myself am a neat freak so when the kids make a mess the mess is going before they leave the room. That being said, if you fire the housekeeper, there is a NEED for someone to clean. you as the SVP fill that need for a very nominal fee. Take your time and makes use that your kids could eat their fruit loops off the floor and all of the sudden you have elevated your stock from caretaker/buff nugget to .....caretaker//buff nugget and housekeeper. Holy shit fellas that to me is a trifecta. the likelihood of finding a guy that can cook, clean and is in shape is like the Jets winning the super bowl with Mark Sanchez at the helm.......1 in a million! Stock rising. Do you see what is happening here?
4. Rock Star Status. I am a stay at home dad with two little girls but there is one thing that i am certain of. I am an absolute Rock Star in their eyes. There is nothing in the world i would not do for them to make them smile and they know that come hell or high water Dad's got their back! Listen to your kids and make sure you never dismiss any of their concerns as silly or unimportant. If they are important enough for them to bring them up,they are important enough for you to listen to. Make every day a Friday and no matter what is going on in this crazy world, shield them from it and make sure that the most disastrous thing in their world is the argument they had on the bus about which Barbie was the hottest. Get involved, volunteer at school, download their favorite music and memorize all of the lyrics. you got one shot deal.......make it count!
Its not full proof....and far from a Bible, but those are some pretty solid stepping stones to make sure you get off to a good start. Best of all.........FREE. WHY? Because I am that type of guy. I believe in paying it forward. Nobody sat me down and gave me the rules, I learned them on my own. Had someone told me these tips I'd be two years ahead of where I am now. Enjoy, and remember........Michael Jordan once said " I missed `100 % of the shots I didn't take" Break some eggs, pull a muscle on the treadmill and have some fun in the process. You get one chance to be a parent........SWING FOR THE FENCES.
SVP- OUT
Wednesday, January 11, 2012
" Hey Dad, ya got a minute? "
In order to get a feeling for the conversation I was so fearing, I need to set the stage for you. My father is an amazing person . He worked his way out of a small town and made a life for himself in the clothing industry that most would envy. He works his tail off and has the toys to show it ...but make no mistake ...the toys were earned. He is a loving husband, a phenomenal role model and most of all is looked up to by all of the grandkids. When Pop Pop hits a room you know it because the kids scatter and all try and make place on his knee. Now rewind a few decades and we have a stern, yet fair guy who never spanked....he never had to . He had that presence that when he entered the room it was all business. He raised his voice occasionally, and that was all we needed to make us get back on track. He has some of the most famous quotes in the family....our favorite is " Ya know sometimes I think you have your head up your ass". I've tried it a few times and clearly nobody can deliver it the way he does. He once told me if I didn't take my earring out ( Yes I had an earring...it was the early 90's ..all guys did) he would remove it himself by pulling it out.....Game set match....I left that fake diamond on the counter before I went back to school !! He told me once I got a job " If you are making money, all your shirts go to the dry cleaner" ....for those of you that know me.....thats where it comes from...if you wrinkle my shirt or mess up my cuffs there is a 90% chance we are going to fight . Needless to say he has been a huge influence on m life. He instilled a work value, he introduced me to fitness and he has always provided an open door policy! That being said...this was not going to be an easy call for me.
So, the promotion is announced, the process of moving to St Louis is under way and there is one phone call that I am dreading........my dad. As you know, if you were ever to ask me who my role model would answer with no hesitation....my dad. He took me in when I was around 10 yrs old when my parents were going through an awful divorce. From that day forward I watched my Dad make my lunch, get me to school and head off to work. My father is an Exec at a large clothing company, and has been working his tail off for the last I can't even count the years. He came from a small community and left to join the Marines to get out, and even named his boat Semper Phi. He has worked since work was an option and the call I had to prepare myself for was one to tell my father, my role model that I was going to be the caregiver and my wife was going to be the breadwinner.
It's not that I feared what his reaction would be because come hell or high water he was going to tell me that he was excited and would offer his blessing. I guess it was a sense of me thinking I was letting him down. Here is a guy that works from bell to bell to provide and live the good life, and here is his son who is a Househusband. The concept still bothers me to this day and quite frankly the majority of the reason I want to get back to work is to restore this feeling of value to my father. I know that he is proud of me and I know that he is ecstatic to see where my family is and the things we have accomplished, but for some reason I just can't shake the feeling that I need to produce more.
So the call is made and guess what ? I went as planned. My father could not have been happier for us and I was excited that he was excited. To this day, and its been three years , he only asks if I am ok, not when are you going back to work or anything that would make me feel out of place. He has responded in the way a mentor, friend and father is supposed to respond. He has been supportive and proud of what we have been able to accomplish and where we are in our lives. I only hope he is as proud of me as I am of him.
Love you Dad !
So, the promotion is announced, the process of moving to St Louis is under way and there is one phone call that I am dreading........my dad. As you know, if you were ever to ask me who my role model would answer with no hesitation....my dad. He took me in when I was around 10 yrs old when my parents were going through an awful divorce. From that day forward I watched my Dad make my lunch, get me to school and head off to work. My father is an Exec at a large clothing company, and has been working his tail off for the last I can't even count the years. He came from a small community and left to join the Marines to get out, and even named his boat Semper Phi. He has worked since work was an option and the call I had to prepare myself for was one to tell my father, my role model that I was going to be the caregiver and my wife was going to be the breadwinner.
It's not that I feared what his reaction would be because come hell or high water he was going to tell me that he was excited and would offer his blessing. I guess it was a sense of me thinking I was letting him down. Here is a guy that works from bell to bell to provide and live the good life, and here is his son who is a Househusband. The concept still bothers me to this day and quite frankly the majority of the reason I want to get back to work is to restore this feeling of value to my father. I know that he is proud of me and I know that he is ecstatic to see where my family is and the things we have accomplished, but for some reason I just can't shake the feeling that I need to produce more.
So the call is made and guess what ? I went as planned. My father could not have been happier for us and I was excited that he was excited. To this day, and its been three years , he only asks if I am ok, not when are you going back to work or anything that would make me feel out of place. He has responded in the way a mentor, friend and father is supposed to respond. He has been supportive and proud of what we have been able to accomplish and where we are in our lives. I only hope he is as proud of me as I am of him.
Love you Dad !
The question , and my title !
With my wife's career , I have had the opportunity to live in two states in my new role. That being said, I have also had to introduce myself to two new groups of friends. This brings about an interesting dynamic for the stay at home dad as well as those that are meeting me for the first time.
It only takes a few meetings before the other guys in the neighborhood see me at the bus stop in my sweats and a hat and eventually the question comes out. " So Pete, what do you do? " My first crack at the question was an ultimate fail, I stammered and could not come up with the response that would leave me looking confident. It was almost like I was trying not to admit the reality. For those of you that know me, you know I do not lack confidence and sometimes err on the side of cocky...:) It took a few times, and some practice, but the response not flows off the tongue like magic...." I am the Senior VP of Household Operations!!" This usually gets a chuckle or two and gives me the opportunity to look like the master of my domain. No, I am not Mr Mom, I am not Daddy Day Care, I am an SVP and you need to respect the role.
I usually get one of two responses and usually it just depends on the confidence of the individual asking as to which way it goes. If I am face to face with the typical guys guy( or so he thinks) I get the " Oh, man you get to watch ESPN all day, take naps and check out all the Moms at the PTA meetings" ....uh, no! Or I get the rare response of " Man that's pretty cool, wish I could do that !"
To the majority, this job is not nearly what you think. It's demanding, it is thankless and most of all has no start time and stop time. Like most of you, you get to go to an office or pretend to be on "calls" for the majority of the day and when the day is over you get to go home, claim to be tired and hit the couch. Me, I start at 6:30 in the morning and go until about 10 at night. When the kids need something its always "Daddy", when they throw up, its "Daddy ", when they wanna watch a movie, well you get the point. I am not complaining, it's awesome to be needed and wanted, but the next time you are about to tell me I sleep all day and watch ESPN, please don't!!! I gave my friends a word of advice which none of them followed. I told them that when they get home from their 3 day "business trips" to give their wives a hug and say thanks. I told them they have no idea what they are going through on a daily basis. They all laughed when I said it and said " Dude, your nuts, I bring home the bacon, they got it easy". It's that type of mentality that leads to the 70% divorce rate in this country!! The next time you have a business trip that lasts longer than 2 days, come home with flowers or a thank you card. Just something that says your not a college frat guy that just ate like a king, drank like a fish and "worked " in Vegas for the last few days !! Trust me it will go a long way and may even put you in good favor if you know what I mean ; ) !!
So the next time you meet a guy and he tells you he's a stay at home dad, don't judge, and don't hate. I drink beer, watch football and workout seven days a week. The difference is I do laundry clean the house and take care of two girls and a ten pound dog. I am the SVP of Household Ops and I'm proud of it. The new Sportscenter is on so I gotta go.
Make it a great one !
It only takes a few meetings before the other guys in the neighborhood see me at the bus stop in my sweats and a hat and eventually the question comes out. " So Pete, what do you do? " My first crack at the question was an ultimate fail, I stammered and could not come up with the response that would leave me looking confident. It was almost like I was trying not to admit the reality. For those of you that know me, you know I do not lack confidence and sometimes err on the side of cocky...:) It took a few times, and some practice, but the response not flows off the tongue like magic...." I am the Senior VP of Household Operations!!" This usually gets a chuckle or two and gives me the opportunity to look like the master of my domain. No, I am not Mr Mom, I am not Daddy Day Care, I am an SVP and you need to respect the role.
I usually get one of two responses and usually it just depends on the confidence of the individual asking as to which way it goes. If I am face to face with the typical guys guy( or so he thinks) I get the " Oh, man you get to watch ESPN all day, take naps and check out all the Moms at the PTA meetings" ....uh, no! Or I get the rare response of " Man that's pretty cool, wish I could do that !"
To the majority, this job is not nearly what you think. It's demanding, it is thankless and most of all has no start time and stop time. Like most of you, you get to go to an office or pretend to be on "calls" for the majority of the day and when the day is over you get to go home, claim to be tired and hit the couch. Me, I start at 6:30 in the morning and go until about 10 at night. When the kids need something its always "Daddy", when they throw up, its "Daddy ", when they wanna watch a movie, well you get the point. I am not complaining, it's awesome to be needed and wanted, but the next time you are about to tell me I sleep all day and watch ESPN, please don't!!! I gave my friends a word of advice which none of them followed. I told them that when they get home from their 3 day "business trips" to give their wives a hug and say thanks. I told them they have no idea what they are going through on a daily basis. They all laughed when I said it and said " Dude, your nuts, I bring home the bacon, they got it easy". It's that type of mentality that leads to the 70% divorce rate in this country!! The next time you have a business trip that lasts longer than 2 days, come home with flowers or a thank you card. Just something that says your not a college frat guy that just ate like a king, drank like a fish and "worked " in Vegas for the last few days !! Trust me it will go a long way and may even put you in good favor if you know what I mean ; ) !!
So the next time you meet a guy and he tells you he's a stay at home dad, don't judge, and don't hate. I drink beer, watch football and workout seven days a week. The difference is I do laundry clean the house and take care of two girls and a ten pound dog. I am the SVP of Household Ops and I'm proud of it. The new Sportscenter is on so I gotta go.
Make it a great one !
Tuesday, January 10, 2012
Raising girls !! and Justin Bieber
If you would have told me in 1995 that I would be a stay at home dad with two little girls, I would have laughed in your face. But looking back on the last three years it is clear to me that I have been given the opportunity of a lifetime. When we had our first child, I cried like a baby and then realized that the big man upstairs was playing a cruel joke on me for giving me a girl. I could see him sitting up there on his lay-z-boy laughing saying" There ya go big guy! Remember all those rotten things you did when you were in High School, and College and wearing that ridiculous ponytail tanning seven days a week? Now you gotta deal with that guy knocking on your front door !!" I could actually hear him laughing. Then we got pregnant again, rephrase, my wife got pregnant again, I did little to nothing to initiate, I'm a guy! We had another little girl, and it hit me, I was going to have to change my mindset, and get ready to prepare these girls for the clowns that are sure to be ringing the doorbell.
Then the life changing call from my wife that we were moving to St Louis, and she would be traveling every other week for 2 to 3 days a week, AKA, " you just got promoted to SVP of Household Operation". I made it through diapers, and even have a favorite princess, Jasmine, she's so hot and I even got my picture taken with her at Disney. Is that creepy? Don't answer that because I don't care ! I started watching Disney movies, and frighteningly enough, really like them. There is a calmness about the movies and a feel good to them that puts a smile on my girls faces, and makes me take notice. You can't get any of that from Power Rangers or Spongebob.
All was good on the home front until our oldest hit 6, then came Bieber Fever. All the sudden it was "Baby, Baby, Baby....oh!! " and purple here there and everywhere. That kid was all over every wall we had in the house and on everything that had a speaker that produced sound. Scariest part was, if you pulled up next to me at a light, my Yukon was pumping Bieber. I tried to fight it with every ounce of my being but that kid was forcing his way into my home like an intruder. He knocked down the door and sat in my favorite char and drank my beer while I just stood there and watched. Then came the worst part of all, his movie. I must say however, I loved it ! I took the girls to see it, and to see their faces was priceless. They sat in their chairs motionless and rocked back and forth when the songs were on, and me, I was rocking in my seat like I was at a Bon Jovi concert in 1993 !! I give the kid credit, he started with a video on YouTube and marketed himself from top to bottom. He worked his butt off to get where he is, and although I want to hate him with every ounce of my being, I can't. He earned his fame and puts a smile on my girls faces so win-win.
My iPod has more kids songs than would like to admit, my DVD collection is certainly not what it used to be but then again neither am I. I am a Dad that has two little girls . I will go to the ends of the earth to see them smile, and make sure that I am a good listener. I will continue to workout and make sure that I am a step faster than any of the 'Dudes" that ring my bell. Yes boys, that was your one and only warning.
The girls are sleeping and my wife is traveling, time for a beer and Two and a Half Men ! (with Charlie Sheen of course!! )
Goodnight !
Then the life changing call from my wife that we were moving to St Louis, and she would be traveling every other week for 2 to 3 days a week, AKA, " you just got promoted to SVP of Household Operation". I made it through diapers, and even have a favorite princess, Jasmine, she's so hot and I even got my picture taken with her at Disney. Is that creepy? Don't answer that because I don't care ! I started watching Disney movies, and frighteningly enough, really like them. There is a calmness about the movies and a feel good to them that puts a smile on my girls faces, and makes me take notice. You can't get any of that from Power Rangers or Spongebob.
All was good on the home front until our oldest hit 6, then came Bieber Fever. All the sudden it was "Baby, Baby, Baby....oh!! " and purple here there and everywhere. That kid was all over every wall we had in the house and on everything that had a speaker that produced sound. Scariest part was, if you pulled up next to me at a light, my Yukon was pumping Bieber. I tried to fight it with every ounce of my being but that kid was forcing his way into my home like an intruder. He knocked down the door and sat in my favorite char and drank my beer while I just stood there and watched. Then came the worst part of all, his movie. I must say however, I loved it ! I took the girls to see it, and to see their faces was priceless. They sat in their chairs motionless and rocked back and forth when the songs were on, and me, I was rocking in my seat like I was at a Bon Jovi concert in 1993 !! I give the kid credit, he started with a video on YouTube and marketed himself from top to bottom. He worked his butt off to get where he is, and although I want to hate him with every ounce of my being, I can't. He earned his fame and puts a smile on my girls faces so win-win.
My iPod has more kids songs than would like to admit, my DVD collection is certainly not what it used to be but then again neither am I. I am a Dad that has two little girls . I will go to the ends of the earth to see them smile, and make sure that I am a good listener. I will continue to workout and make sure that I am a step faster than any of the 'Dudes" that ring my bell. Yes boys, that was your one and only warning.
The girls are sleeping and my wife is traveling, time for a beer and Two and a Half Men ! (with Charlie Sheen of course!! )
Goodnight !
The grocery store .......
Somebody told me that I should start keeping a log my observations so I decided that this year I would give it a shot. I have been a stay at home dad now for three years and it has been nothing short of amazing. I have two girls.. 4 and 7 and my wife is an Executive at a large company. I'm hoping the writing will be therapeutic. If you enjoy it let me know, and if you don't, let me know too !!! That being said, let's go to the grocery store.
Well, today was the day to go to the grocery store, not just any grocery store, but the new grocery store that has all the great deals that draw people in from miles away to save pennies at best. Not only is it annoying to even have to go, but add a 4yr old who, more than likely will have to pee at some point, and a group of senior citizens being dropped off by a bus, and you know that there is gonna be trouble.
The trip begins with picking out the cart. The place is so crowded to begin with and my little one decides that she wants the cart that is twice the size of the regular cart therefore making it next to impossible to get through the aisles even if nobody is there. Ok, cart picked, and we are off and running, or slowly rolling.
My beef with this particular store( Shop Rite of Niskayuna) is that they have more employees working in the aisles than customers shopping, so navigating your way through without hitting somebody is next to impossible. We navigate through and are going great, checking things off and having a blast when all the sudden here it comes..."Dad I gotta pee" So off we go, cart half full and looking for the bathroom which of course is in the least accessible spot in the store. We do our business and exit as the older gentleman in the flannel waits outside the stall to get ready to take care of his morning business. Dude really, do that at home, the grocery sore should be a last pee resort not a place to drop the kids at the pool.
So we continue, and now the place is packed. The older ladies who are once smiling are now bumping carts and not acting so cordially to one another. Finally it happens, the cart stand off. Two ladies trying to navigate the aisle with room for only one, one smiles, the other does not and verbally assaults. "It's not that bad " I say as we pass and smile as to say get a grip on yourself it's the grocery store. There are much bigger issues in the world than you and your produce, TRUST ME !!
We make it through and I need a stiff drink and a massage. My shoulders are up high and if somebody comes near me they are going to get slapped. The entire time my 4 yr old is singing a Rihanna song " Cheers to the freakin weekend". Man I love this kid, the world could be on fire and she would still be singing. Ahh, the parking lot. We have made it to a safe place where there is no blue hair, no cart wars and a sense of peace. After all that, I check the receipt in the car and realize I forgot to use two coupons and got jacked on an item that was supposed to be on sale. Normally not a big deal, but my wife is a coupon clipping maniac. I ponder going back in to get the adjustment, but the blue haired bus pulls up to pick up the seniors, so instead of going in I decide to scrap the receipt and make no mention of the shopping slip ups of the day. My 4yr old has no idea so I am safe. Good times !! Well, tomorrow is gym day and if last weeks trainer smash into the machine is any indication on how it will go, you might wanna tune in.
SVP-OUT!
Well, today was the day to go to the grocery store, not just any grocery store, but the new grocery store that has all the great deals that draw people in from miles away to save pennies at best. Not only is it annoying to even have to go, but add a 4yr old who, more than likely will have to pee at some point, and a group of senior citizens being dropped off by a bus, and you know that there is gonna be trouble.
The trip begins with picking out the cart. The place is so crowded to begin with and my little one decides that she wants the cart that is twice the size of the regular cart therefore making it next to impossible to get through the aisles even if nobody is there. Ok, cart picked, and we are off and running, or slowly rolling.
My beef with this particular store( Shop Rite of Niskayuna) is that they have more employees working in the aisles than customers shopping, so navigating your way through without hitting somebody is next to impossible. We navigate through and are going great, checking things off and having a blast when all the sudden here it comes..."Dad I gotta pee" So off we go, cart half full and looking for the bathroom which of course is in the least accessible spot in the store. We do our business and exit as the older gentleman in the flannel waits outside the stall to get ready to take care of his morning business. Dude really, do that at home, the grocery sore should be a last pee resort not a place to drop the kids at the pool.
So we continue, and now the place is packed. The older ladies who are once smiling are now bumping carts and not acting so cordially to one another. Finally it happens, the cart stand off. Two ladies trying to navigate the aisle with room for only one, one smiles, the other does not and verbally assaults. "It's not that bad " I say as we pass and smile as to say get a grip on yourself it's the grocery store. There are much bigger issues in the world than you and your produce, TRUST ME !!
We make it through and I need a stiff drink and a massage. My shoulders are up high and if somebody comes near me they are going to get slapped. The entire time my 4 yr old is singing a Rihanna song " Cheers to the freakin weekend". Man I love this kid, the world could be on fire and she would still be singing. Ahh, the parking lot. We have made it to a safe place where there is no blue hair, no cart wars and a sense of peace. After all that, I check the receipt in the car and realize I forgot to use two coupons and got jacked on an item that was supposed to be on sale. Normally not a big deal, but my wife is a coupon clipping maniac. I ponder going back in to get the adjustment, but the blue haired bus pulls up to pick up the seniors, so instead of going in I decide to scrap the receipt and make no mention of the shopping slip ups of the day. My 4yr old has no idea so I am safe. Good times !! Well, tomorrow is gym day and if last weeks trainer smash into the machine is any indication on how it will go, you might wanna tune in.
SVP-OUT!
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