So, today my daughter got off the bus and within the first three steps of her coming towards me, I could tell she did not have a good day. To my credit I immediately identified it and asked her if we could sit down when we got home to talk it over. To my surprise, she agreed. Ya see, my oldest daughter is extremely sensitive and rarely wants to express her feelings to me so when she said yes, I knew i needed to take full advantage of the situation.
So, we sit down to talk about her day and immediately she goes into defensive mode and tries to explain how she had nothing to do with what happened today. As a loving dad, I wanna believe her, but I know her too well to know that this is impossible. The conversation continues and we get to the part where I ask her how many issues did we have today. I was only kidding when I posed the question , but when she started counting in her head how many issues she had today I knew that I was in it for the long haul. Final tally......6 issues in one day.
So, here we are Dad and daughter on the couch starting to address the 6 issues of the day when I realize that these issues have nothing to do with school, but more to do with her classmates.
Issue 1. So and so was mean to me
Issue 2. So and so said I was being rude
Issue 3. So and so bailed on me at the playground
Issue 4. So and so said I was a liar
Issue 5. So and so said I was making faces at her
Issue 6. So and so was moving and would no longer be sitting next o me on the bus.
Ok, so now I have all 6 issues in front of me I need to decide how I am going to handle them. Do I take each issue on 1 by 1, or do try and tackle them all at once. Thoughts?? Well, I took them on all at once.
For you Dad's out there with girls you can identify. You grew up a dude and when dudes had an argument they punched each other or made some ridiculous comment about the other one's mother and quickly moved on to who was gonna hook up with Suzie Q at the dance the following weekend. Well, guess what, that simply does not fly in the world of girls. They argue, they make up, and 5 minutes later they are arguing again. Its mid boggling to me that at the ripe old age of 8 ,my daughter is going through this
Apparently when you are a girl of the 8-teen variety, there is a dynamic at play that involves a great deal of` manipulation and a great deal of hair loss for the parent listening to the story! As I am sitting there watching my little girl cry as she tells the story I am thinking back to the days when I was 8 and all I could envision was a Nerf football and a huffy bike that I could do made wheelies on. These girls are already to the point of forming packs and cutting you at the knees on the playground.
So I dive in, and try to address the issues with a one size fits all approach. " Ya know sweetheart, girls can be a bit mean. They tend to travel in 2's and wen you throw a 3rd girl in the mix, it completely throws off the balance of power, and the one who is used to getting all of the attention quickly realizes she needs to do something to gain it back which usually results in you getting the short end of the stick" As I am sure you could imagine, I get a blank stare and still more tears.
Phase 2! I quickly recover and decide that this is going to be one of this enlightening moments whee I explain to my daughter that maybe today people were having a bad day and that thats why they made tomorrow's. Still a blank stare and more tears. Epic fail.
Phase 3. Reach in for the hug , hold her tight and promise her that everything will be OK. We laugh a bit about how girls pretty much suck, and I remind her, as I do 3-4 times a week, that " Friends will come and go, but you will always have your sister" . Hopefully she gets it before I am too senile to witness it.
See, if she were a boy, I could tell her to sucker punch the kid on the playground with a roll of quarters in his fist and get a good laugh out of it, but this girl thing really adds a dynamic that I think most SAHD's are not prepared for. Girls today are brutal !! Here I am thinking I am going to have to protect them from boyfriends. What a crock!
Oh, and if all of this is not enough, a boy in her class told her this week that he liked her!!!!! Dude, you're 8... stay focused on your pokemon cards and get the hell away from my daughter. I am proud to report that she told him that she did not like him that way, and that she liked him as a friend. As someone who has heard that a few times, I am totally cool with it!
SVP-OUT!
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